I received a lot of advice when I shared my story, and nearly everyone urged me not to disclose the woman’s infidelity to her husband. The consensus was that I should mind my own business and let the couple handle their issues.
This had always been my intention, but I felt the need to seek other perspectives, which is why I shared my story. Rather than being cast as the villain, I decided to be the person who brought some clarity to the situation.
One evening, the woman came knocking on my door because she noticed my lights were still on. She asked, “Why are you up so late?” I replied, “I’m just on social media, you know how it is, sometimes it gets lonely.”
She chuckled and said, “You’ve been here for a while now, I’m surprised you don’t have a boyfriend.” We continued chatting on the verandah, and eventually, I said, “There’s something important I’d like to discuss with you, but only when you have time.”
She responded, “An important conversation? Can’t we talk about it now, or are you getting sleepy?”
She went into her room and changed into something comfortable. She returned, ready to talk, and asked, “I’m all ears, what’s on your mind?” It was a difficult conversation to initiate, but I was determined to help the situation.
I said, “I’ve noticed a man who frequently visits here, and I see his shadow around often. I know you’re married, and you love your husband deeply, but the way this man comes around and the times he does, people might get the wrong idea. They might start talking, and if you’re not careful, your husband might hear about it. I’m concerned, so I thought it best to discuss it with you.”
She regarded me with a displeased expression, the way one does when they hear something they don’t like. She inquired, “How do you know it’s the same person coming here? It could be anyone, maybe one of my relatives or in-laws. How can you jump to the conclusion that it’s him?” I replied, “I saw him clearly that day, so I’m confident about what I’m saying.
Even if he is a relative, outsiders won’t know, and they’ll gossip. I’m just looking out for you because you’ve been so kind to me since I moved here.” She asked, “Is this the important thing you wanted to discuss with me?” I nodded and said, “Yes, that’s all. I don’t want people to form a negative impression. This is a small community.” She retorted, “I’m not a child. I know how to handle my affairs.”
After our conversation, she distanced herself from me and turned cold. We’d cross paths in front of our doors, and I’d greet her, but she wouldn’t respond. Even when she came home early, she avoided talking to me. I reached out to her by phone, asking what the problem was, and she replied, “I’m keeping to myself to prevent people from spreading false information to my husband.”
I began considering moving to a new place. Her husband would call me occasionally to inquire about her, and my responses were always the same. Eventually, he realized I wasn’t willing to divulge information about his wife, so he reduced his calls. He’d text to ask if his wife was at home, and I’d respond with either “Yes, she’s here” or “I’m not home, so I can’t tell.”
I began searching for a new residence. I contacted the same agent who had helped me find my current place and asked him to find me a new one. He questioned, “Why are you moving so soon? Is the wife causing problems for you? If that’s the case, tell me, and I can talk to the husband.” I told him, “There’s nothing wrong; I just need a change.
I’ll be getting married soon, so I want a place where I can live with my husband.” He suspected something wasn’t right but I wasn’t ready to reveal the whole story. He eventually found me a new place, and I took it because I just wanted to escape the complications of my current living situation.
A week before I left, I went to her door and informed her, “I’ve been offered a new place by my office, so I’ll be moving soon.” She was a bit surprised but maintained a composed demeanor. She said, “That’s fine. I’ll speak to my husband and refund the remainder of your rent. Let me know when you’re leaving, and I’ll arrange it for you.”
On the day of my departure, I revealed everything to her. “Your husband suspects your infidelity; that’s why I spoke to you that day.” I shared all the arrangements he had made with me and even showed her our messages to prove I was telling the truth. She read the messages and her face filled with sadness.
She asked, “You didn’t tell him anything, did you?” I replied, “If I had, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. Your husband loves you, but he’s becoming increasingly aggressive due to what he’s hearing. If that guy is indeed your relative or one of his relatives, clarify it with him because the person informing him doesn’t know this fact.”
I left, seeking a peaceful life in my new place, until recently when the consequences of my actions began to surface. She called me early one morning, hurling insults and accusations over the phone. “You left here so you could report to him and get the money, didn’t you? I knew you had ulterior motives from the day you arrived.
You came here to wreck another woman’s marriage. Do you think you’ll ever have peace in your own marriage? I swear on my mother’s grave, you’ll never go unpunished. You’ll never get married, and if you do, you’ll suffer all the wrongs in your marriage. Do you think I’m an easy target? Did you ever consider that you could destroy my marriage and find peace? Just watch me.”
Her curses didn’t rattle me, and her anger didn’t intimidate me because I knew I was innocent. However, everything that was happening made me wonder if I had made a mistake by not telling her husband. I hadn’t told him, but I was now facing these consequences. Was it any different from what would have happened if I had informed him? I blocked her and her husband’s numbers, hoping for some peace.
I hadn’t heard from them in a few days, but I knew it probably wasn’t over. She was determined to find the person who had exposed her, and I seemed like an easy suspect. The agent who had helped me find the new place called me recently and said, “The landlord’s wife has been calling me daily. She wants to know where you live. What’s going on?” I responded, “You’re the only one who knows my new address. If she finds out, it’ll be because you told her. Please don’t reveal it. She needs to deal with her husband, not me.”
She continues to call me, but I don’t answer. She sends me threatening messages, accusing me of wanting her husband. “I saw it in your eyes when you arrived. You think I didn’t notice? You came here to ruin my marriage, didn’t you? Well, he’s single now. Go for him. But I promise you this, you’ll never know peace if you ever come near my husband.”
I’m not shaken by her curses or threats because I know I did the right thing. However, I can’t help but wonder if maybe, just maybe, I should have told her husband from the beginning. My name is Nancy, and I don’t back down when attacked for the wrong reasons.
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